ông thật là quá đáng…

chẳng lẽ ông lại là thể loại nhỏ nhen đến như vậy , tôi nói thế đâu có phải là tôi mean như thế. Ông lúc nào cũng nhận ông khéo nhưng có vẻ ông đang “mèo khen mèo dài đuôi”.
Tại sao, tuần này đã thứ 4 mà vẫn chưa đến, chẳng lẽ lời nói che dấu của một đứa đang có tình cảm với ông đủ làm ông thấy tự ái và không đến sao.
Thôi, nếu như tôi mà gào được vào mặt ông ” Tôi thix ông” thì ít ra giờ đỡ rồi… Không biết ông giờ này đang làm gie, đi chết đi.

to go forward or not ?

I thought when you leave a feeling aside, don’t touch it, don’t do anything to it, not even trying to suppress it, just simply make it go with the flow then soon or later it becomes cold and colder, I might be free from those hassles.

I wish that I could tell you how much it hurts when every time i get near you, same as much much happy and delightful when I talk to you. I tried to be cold to you, tried to be ruthless, tried to produce nonstop whining, excuse with lot of reasons and harsh feeling, just to make me hate you more and more. But seems it’s quite hopeless, the more I tried, the dearer you could feel when your presence is there. Just thinking about you make me happy but hurtful at the same time. I wouldn’t say we could become a couple or something, coz it’s far from being possible since you are not the same as me.

The only way to cure my frustration and fill my salvation for you are gazing at you, trying to take care of you. For every single thing you thanked me even those were just politeness, I’m more than happy to hear.

Dear, those feelings I don’t want you to know though I desperately want you to know. Quite to be contradictory, isn’t it. I think you might have known it but quite uncertain. Let it be that way and i’m trying to make uncertainty to be the same. For when those uncertainties are finally uncovered that is when all the hates, doubt and ugly feeling of you would get toward be. Let it be that way, let it be that way… It’s much better to be slightly cute day and day then agonizing finishing slash to my heart. GONNA KEEP IT THAT WAY…

Anyway, rest well, dear. You need to get better when the semester begins.
This morning the way you curved yourself in the blanket because of the cold just make my worry so much but hopelessly, I couldn’t do anything else except arrange the blanket for you. Couldn’t say: “rest well” or “i’m worried about you”. Therefore, simply get better and I’m more than happy to see that.

dear

why the hell i am trembling for … you’re right here, your face are so close to me and yet I can’t kiss you. Please seal this kind of hopeless situation to let me once again enjoy a life free of restrictions and hassles….

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My life in August

I should have spent more time on writing the blog but I got no time ( more like no will to fight back the laziness). Many things have happened on these months that I’ve studying abroad, new experience both bad and good but I didn’t regret it, I am appreciating it that I actually learning the truth of this real world and starting to grow eventually.

Many thing can be very trivial to say but when you’re starting out by own, cooking, doing laundry, even sleeping are that nuisance. When I was in my little town, though I’m fine by cooking myself since i enjoy cooking and making things, many hardship that comes along when i finally live alone. Nobody goes after me to clean up, nobody give me the money fix the bad-cooking one and even when you go shopping, you need to carry a huge bag which contains foods for the week. The thing does matter when the night comes. my hands become so swollen ( well, it’s weird for a guy to say this), and it hurts me a lot even with typing my computer. Even for the food money; when I was still in my little hometown, i always complains my mom about the food” Awww, why you have t be so stingy at food, food money is that much”, i think i do now. You do spend little money while you’re doing shopping but at the same time, you need to buy it several times which can bill you up to 200$ a month the whole food money. Many little and little things that I couldn’t imagine like swollen hands, the burned hand that nobody gonna babysit me, could be this non-trivial at all. Maybe I’m a little more grow up days by days.

Maybe just because of some trivial hardships that I have gone through, I actually caused a quarrel with someone just come to Australia who intoxicated himself in luxurious life style by paying so much money. Maybe this comes all out because of my envy and jealousy. All of my accommodation and transportation fee, probably cost me around 170 per week, while that one pay himself 250 per week just for himself and babbling all about the “efficiency” of money that he doesn’t have to cook and nothing else… but I find myself a good reason ( maybe just an excuse to save myself from my own jealousy of some rich bastards): maybe I do have a hardship, but I do believe that when I head back to my country, I’m gonna be high head and be proud that the money that not only pay for my education but also pay for my mature. I believe so and keep on believe me.

I didn’t know that writing some kind of cheesy confession on a random blog could sooth you so much.Btw, i still wondering if I should go to sleep or continue to roaming on the net until i collapse n my tiredness. It’s 6:55 AM on Sunday already. But after this little long morning nap, I gonna focus on my Earthsmart logo since I have abandon it for 2 weeks. Time to get it done. Then probably do the magazine design. I got so many good ideas for it btu somehow they are required some very detailed workmanship. I didn’t know communication design could be this challenging. No more ” It looks great on the screen but .. when we print it out… bah blah”. i think it’s enough time to be a photoshop kid, it’s time to be act professional, that’s why they got us a big printer that we could print for free so that we can see the design our-self: life-size and kerning correctedly. Also about the magazine, i have lot and lot of idea for the magazine, however putting all of those thoughts into a single magazine maybe hard and some of they contradicting each other which really discourage me from doing the magazine.

I think that’s it, haven’t felt sleepy yet but i may try t read something else until the call of slumber finally takes over me.

Tegami – Haikei Jugo no Kimi He

Download: Tegami – Haikei Jugo no Kimi He

This song really put me forward in this hard day.Thanks to Miayu for recommending such a great song.

It’s about a 15 years old girl who write a letter to her future self hoping for answer.
As far as I know, this song is a main theme song for this year middle school graduation. 15 years old is a the age when the students are on their grade 9 which is about to graduate. This age is all about many wondering, rebellion. Also it was played in most graduation ceremony and performed by Angela Aki herself. In some school live, some students actually cried while Angela was singing. That can’t be helped since it’s a  such touching song also they are about the be separate from their old friend &school as well.

This is a romanji & lyric, translated in vietnamese by Miayu. You can visit her and write her some comment. When i have time I will translate those into English. Now it serves for Japanese and Vietnamese Community. Cheers !!!

~~

手紙 ～拝啓 十五の君へ～
Tegami ~ Haike Jugo No Kimi He
Lá thư ~gửi cho em — mười lăm tuổi~

~~

拝啓　この手紙読んでいるあなたは
どこで何をしているのだろう
十五の僕には誰にも話せない
悩みの種があるのです

Haikei kono tegami yondeiru anata wa
Doko de nani wo shiteiru no darou
Juugo no boku ni wa dare ni mo hanasenai
Nayami no tane ga aru no desu

Thân gửi, người đang đọc lá thư này
Em tự hỏi người đang ở đâu và đang làm gì
Em – mười lăm tuổi, có những nỗi ưu phiền
Không thể chia sẻ với bất kì ai

未来の自分に宛てて書く手紙なら
きっと素直に打ち明けられるだろう

Mirai no jibun ni atete kaku tegami nara
Kitto sunao ni uchiake rareru darou

Nếu lá thư này có thể gửi đến chính mình ở tương lai
Nhất định người có thể giãi bày thẳng thắn những tâm sự này

今　負けそうで　泣きそうで　消えてしまいそうな僕は
誰の言葉を信じ歩けばいいの
ひとつしかないこの胸が何度もばらばらに割れて
苦しい中で今を生きている
今を生きている

Ima makesou de nakisou de kieteshimaisou na boku wa
Dare no kotoba wo shinji arukeba ii no
Hitotsu shika nai kono mune ga nando mo barabara ni warete
Kurushii naka de ima wo ikiteiru
Ima wo ikiteiru

Bây giờ đây, em gần như thất bại và chỉ còn biết khóc
Như một người sắp biến mất
Em nên tin vào những lời của ai đây?
Một và chỉ một trái tim này đã vỡ vụn không biết bao lần
Em đang sống giữa những nỗi đau
Nay em vẫn đang sống…

拝啓　ありがとう　十五のあなたに伝えたい事があるのです
自分とは何でどこへ向かうべきか　問い続ければ見えてくる

Haikei arigatou juugo no anata ni
Tsutaetai koto ga aru no desu
Jibun to wa nani de doko e mukau beki ka
Toitsudzukereeba mietekuru

Thân gửi tôi – mười lăm tuổi, cảm ơn em
Tôi có vài điều muốn nói với em
Nếu em hỏi nơi nào và cái gì để em sẽ hướng đến
Thì câu trả lời chỉ có chính em có thể thấy mà thôi

荒れた青春の海は厳しいけれど
明日の岸辺へと　夢の舟よ進め

Areta seishun no umi wa kibishii keredo
Asu no kishibe e to yume no fune yo susume

Đại dương tuổi trẻ đầy những giông tố rất khắc nghiệt
Nhưng hãy vững tay chèo con thuyền của những giấc mơ
tiến đến bờ bến của ngày mai

今　負けないで　泣かないで　消えてしまいそうな時は
自分の声を信じ歩けばいいの
大人の僕も傷ついて眠れない夜はあるけど
苦くて甘い今を生きている

Ima makenai de nakanai de kieteshimaisou na toki wa
Jibun no koe wo shinjiaru keba ii no
Otona no boku mo kizutsuite nemurenai yoru wa aru kedo
Nigakute amai ima ikiteiru

Ngay lúc này, đừng nản chí và đừng khóc em nhé
Trong những khoảng thời gian mất mát đó
Hãy tin vào tiếng nói của bản thân
Là người trưởng thành, tôi cũng có những lúc trắng đêm khi bị tổn thương
Nhưng tôi vẫn đang sống trong những ngày ngọt-đắng này

人生の全てに意味があるから　恐れずにあなたの夢を育てて

Jinsei no subete ni imi ga aru kara
Osorezu ni anata no yume wo sodatete

Mọi thứ trong cuộc sống này luôn có một ý nghĩa của nó
Thế nên đừng lo sợ gì, hãy luôn nuôi dưỡng những giấc mơ của em

La la la, la la la
Keep on believing
La la la, la la la,
Keep on believing, keep on believing, keep on believing

負けそうで　泣きそうで　消えてしまいそうな僕は
誰の言葉を信じ歩けばいいの

Makesou de nakisou de kieteshimaisou na boku wa
Dare no kotoba wo shinji arukeba ii no

Bây giờ đây, em gần như thất bại và chỉ còn biết khóc
Như một người sắp biến mất
Em nên tin vào những lời của ai đây?

ああ　負けないで　泣かないで　消えてしまいそうな時は
自分の声を信じ歩けばいいの
いつの時代も悲しみを避けては通れないけれど
笑顔を見せて　今を生きていこう
今を生きていこう

Aa makenaii de nakanai de kieteshimaisou na toki wa
Jibun no koe wo shinjiarukeba ii no
Itsu no jidai mo kanashimi mo sakete wa torenai keredo
Egao wo misete ima wo ikite yukou
Ima wo ikite yukou

Ngay lúc này, đừng nản chí và đừng khóc em nhé
Trong những khoảng thời gian mất mát đó
Hãy tin vào tiếng nói của bản thân
Ở thời đại nào cũng vậy, không có cách nào để tránh né những đau buồn
Với nụ cười luôn ngự trị trên gương mặt, hãy sống thế em nhé
Hãy sống cho hiện tại như thế

拝啓　この手紙読んでいるあなたが
幸せな事を願います

Haikei kono tegami yondeiru anata ga
Shiawase na koto wo negaimasu

Thân gửi, người đang đọc lá thư này
Tôi ước mong em được hạnh phúc…

–

Translate by Miayu

Tea party

Tea time is sure relaxing .. with few crackers and a good tea. It’s just enough for relaxing.
Btw, my stock for gruyere cheese has ran out, sigh. I felt so unsalted without those things.

This one is Jasmine Green Tea ( just perfect aroma)

It’s seem like I’m not gonna get rid of this habit :-<
Those tea is really effective on keeping me awake all the time. Most of time, espresso can be quite a good drink but somehow it was such a strong drink that It might destroy my taste soon or later. Thus, tea is better also has wide variety. Normally making an espresso at home is quite impossible with the coffee filter. By the way, those caffeine thing really keeps my spirit up for very long time. Gonna work hard, I have a shot to do for tomorrow. I just hate 9x super star-wannabe too much but I need to work with one tomorrow. How pitiful I am .

A peek at everyday yosakoi practise

Well, it happened that I have brought my camera last Sunday. We arrived there quite late due to the rain (which refrained team from practicing too), so we couldn’t be marked late or something like that lol. Btw, it was such a boring day since the rain has spoiled everthing including the present of most member also their dance spirit since the park ground became damn slippery which could send off anyone to hospital immediately.

Now is the main dish:

This little red things are called Naruko ( no confused with Naruko in Naruto guys). It was originally used by Japanese farmers in old days for scaring off the birds ( or it gonna be a sad harvest season). To participate in Yosakoi Matsuri (yosakoi festival), Naruko is a must, though it only come optional in Yosakoi Souran festival. But nowaday Souran and Yosakoi are sometimes misunderstood as one. ( they have the same spirit, maybe)

Two of Yosago teamates began to heat up their muscles with Nana sensei no Yosakoi( still got some copy infringment with this damn song, only practise NO OUTSIDE SHOW, wth). The ground is shining (damn slippery, be careful guys).

This is not good, don’t take pic of me with my own camera guys. That’s not a good manner >”<.

This is the main show, Jasmine, her dancing is damnly charming though the that day weather totally pissing her off ( smile plz girl >”<)

Edited: Due to Jasmine ‘s request that the first two pics  are too violating her … “copyright infringement”, so this is new thing .. YAYYY FOR IT

No … “copy infringement” for this one .. YAYYY haha

Sometimes being an idiot is nice.

Yeah, sometimes it can be pretty for being such a blind being. Really, you don’t get hurt when you did something wrong coz you dont really realize that its actually wrong.

Dear friend, if you want to stay in your happiness then please stay as an idiot for the rest of your whole life or reality will crush you when you recognize it. I dont know if what i have behave to you is right or noT, but surely, it’s the best solution for both of us. But can I say this little apology to you though it wont reach you ( and i dont care).

Remember our first meet, when you was still a bou who worn shirt and jean like a suit in class. However, my impression was like: ” wow, what a cutie”. But I pretended that i dont really pay attention and even when you tried to impress me on something, i had to try mybest to hide it. However, i just love your smiling face and your stupid jokes but I CANT SHOW YOU THAT. That’s why sometimes, you: being an idiot is nice. If you had been a sharp person, probably I couldn’t hide it.

Everytime you was sad, I really wanted to share it with you and gaze at your lovely face but… again I COULDN’T. How pathetic. “You’re such loser, getting depressed by such a lame thing”. Sorry for that but I couldn’t even help myself at that time.

All the time, i tried to make fun of you by saying i do love you then you was pissed again. Since you do think that I really did make fun of you. Well, idiot sometimes are easy to deal with.

” Sorry I can’t come with you, I’m kinda busy”, sorry for telling you such obvious lie and yet you did realized that it’s a fake thing. Well, that’s how i said you’re easy to deal with. At least, telling you such lie may piss you off and cut all the connections. Sorry about that too but this is feeling matter. It hurt me more than it hurt you.

Good byes, mate.

Hokudai Enishi ! GOOOOO !!!

Those guys ‘ dances are just too much to take. It’s damnly too cool and majestic. Maybe someday Yosago can do a dance like this. The choreography is somewhat simple but yet powerful. I like how they incorporate team work in here: the shouting, the raising head also … mass stripped dances. It’s just fabulous.

Searching for their dance music is just … horrible. I have found none but a crappy version ripped from nicovideo. Sigh…i began to hate the copyright stuffs. Just too bad.
Btw, tmr, i will start to select the fabric for my Odori Hanten. Yayyy